POF: Plenty of FAIL

POF: Plenty of FAIL

You’re laughing, right? Thinking of your own wonderful experiences? I try and think, “Maybe I was too judgmental; I should give men a second chance, presenting yourselves to the female race is an a ominous and risky task.”

I signed up for the lovely Plenty of Fish this summer looking for some carefree dating (hiking, beach, the movies, and maybe to hit some museums). What I got was a lot of lame salutations regarding my looks and what men want to do to them. Lovely, isn’t it?

I literally wrote a whole chapter on my life; all my interests, passions, and personality to boot. This then led to many responses claiming how similar we were and how we should totally date; the similarities being of course that I like music and the outdoors. Oh, congratulations, you too are a human with 5 senses. We should totally skip dating and put a ring on it!

To sum up the binder full of eligible men, I will say the variety is lacking. We have your divorced man who still thinks a young woman in her twenties is looking for some 50 Shades of Abuse. Next is the post high-school jock that would have never dated you 10 years ago, but due to your education feels like you may be a safe-bet sugar momma. My absolute favorite, and how could I forget, is the New England homebred. I was mostly contacted by slightly overweight and now balding men in American Eagle carpenter jeans and Nikes who state on their profiles that they are “wicked huge die-hahd Boston” fans, love their trucks, and listen to only country tunes; they love contacting me, not reading that I have no use for watching organized sports and love the fine arts. That’s right- from the symphony to the ballet, plan on accompanying me.

But no, ladies, no. We need to have high standards. I wish all the women out there the best of luck in their search. Don’t give up and don’t give in. Settling is unattractive, period. I may be single, but I am sure as hell happier being single than parenting some man-child and picking up after him. Embrace your singularity and remember patience is a virtue. It may be a long shot, but I just might meet a nice, reasonable, cultured man in person, right?



About K.A

Lover of Amy Winehouse. Music Business Administration Northeastern Grad. Ferosh Couturista

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I’m lookin’ for someone. I like to talk to people deep into the night. No fatties, no hamsters.

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