- You dread going to bed because you know it’s going to be an all-out holy war on the the sheet/blanket game.
Goodnight, honey. I love you, too.
2. You demand that your partner brush his teeth before, during and after sex. Also, it’s good if he showers too. Maybe shaves. But now that process is taking too long so you’re gonna just nix it and go to bed.
4. You only find your partner sexually attractive in formal wear and even then, your brain finds something wrong with their appearance and it is mostly that they resemble their mothball-smelling mother whom you can’t stand.
7. You’re walking to Whole Foods and your partner interrupts your thought to remind you the electric bill is overdue. Now you’re both stopped in the middle of the sidewalk addressing “poor communication skills” for the one-millionth time.
9. Rick Steves, the travel Guru, is starting to look pretty damn hot and you’re fantasizing about what he might do to you in a castle in Scotland, when suddenly your partner violently clears his sinuses.